Tired Clooneys golden excuse By Andrei Harmsworth Rough: Hairy Clooney greets Meryl Streep at the awards Picture: AP E xhausted George Clooney was the butt of jokes at an awards bash at the weekend but he hit back by claiming hed had a secret affair with an 88- year-old actress. Clooney had been running on empty after organising MTVs Hope For Haiti telethon which raised 40million. He looked more than a bit jaded at the Screen Actors Guild Awards in LA on Saturday. But he was all smiles again as he took to the stage to present the last award of the ceremony. Veteran Golden Girls star Betty White had earlier joked in her acceptance speech for her life achievement award that she had had a couple of the celebrities in the audience and grinned: You know who you are! Clooney, 48, carried on the joke, telling the audience: I would like to thank Betty White for her discretion. A friend of mine told me she was a bobcat in the sack, he joked, adding She just sat down. Shes going to come and hit me. Meanwhile, Jeff Bridges and Sandra Bullocks Oscar chances improved with their best actor and actress victories for Crazy Heart and The Blind Side. I would be a hostess or a waitress or a house restorer before I ever considered myself an actor, because I never thought I was good enough, said Bullock afterwards. By contrast, the computer-assisted performances in James Camerons Avatar didnt make the cut for the SAG nominations. But it remains a strong best picture contender at the Oscars in March. Quentin Tarantinos Inglourious Basterds took SAGs best ensemble acting prize and best supporting actor for Christoph Waltz. Bobcat: Betty White And the award for best joke goes to... Best comedy: Penelope Cruz falls foul of her prankster co-stars, who reveal them- selves onstage later Picture: Splash Penelope Cruz fell victim to a prank by her Nine co-stars at the Screen Actors Guild awards. The 35-year-old Spanish beauty was backstage with Nicole Kidman, Kate Hudson and Marion Cotillard when she was introduced as one of the nominees for best supporting female. But as the camera cut to her, the three jokers stuck their hands out from behind a wall and began making funny signs behind her back. Cruz quickly realised what they were up to, though, and jokingly wrestled their arms back behind the wall although it was not clear who the culprits were until the girls all appeared on stage together to introduce their film as one of the nominees for outstanding cast. Game for a laugh: Drew Barrymore finds awards night a big giggle All smiles: Sandra Bullock won best actress for The Blind Side Victoria Beckham will get involved in the new Spice Girls musical Viva Forever, Mel B has confirmed to Hello! magazine. All five of us are really super excited, said Scary. Mamma Mia! producer Judy Craymer will direct the show, it emerged last week. Its going to be fictional but various characters will have traits that will remind you of the group, said the hit producer. The stars you love to love... the stars you love to hate Posh in Spice musical index.html2.html3.html4.html5.html6.html7.html8.html9.html10.html11.html12.html13.html14.html15.html16.html17.html18.html19.html20.html21.html22.html23.html