Listings Key: R Repeat; T Text; W Widescreen Channel 43e BBC1 BBC2 UTV 11.55 FILM: Dick Tracy (1990) (T,W) Adventure, starring Warren Beatty. 1.55 FILM: Tristan And Isolde (2005) (T,W) 4.10 Deal Or No Deal: Scrooge Or Santa (T) 5.00 The Simpsons (R,T) 5.30 The Simpsons (R,T) 6.00 Hollyoaks (T) 6.30 Hollyoaks (T) 7.00 Channel 4 News (T) 7.55 3 Minute Wonder: 12 Days Of Christmas (R,T) 8.00 Celebrity Come Dine With Me Christmas Special (T) 9.00 Gordon Ramsays F Word (T) 10.20 Alan Carr: Chatty Man Christmas Special (T) See highlights 11.30 The Big Bang Theory (T) 11.55 The Big Bang Theory (T) 10.00 France 24 11.00 Mo Laethanta Saoire (R) 11.30 Blaisn Beatha 12.00 Comhr (R) 12.30 Irish Paint Magic (R) 1.00 An Aimsir Lithreach 1.05 The Virginian (R) 2.30 Cla 4 5.25 The Hills (R) 5.55 8 Simple Rules 6.25 Rad: The Groms Ride The Rockies 6.57 An Aimsir Lithreach 7.00 Nuacht TG4 7.30 7 L 8.00 Cogar (R) 8.30 Ros Na Rn (T) 9.00 An Aimsir Lithreach 9.05 FILM: Collateral Damage (2002) Thriller, with Arnold Schwarzenegger. 11.05 An Jig Gig (R) 12.05 An Aimsir Lithreach 12.10 FILM: Bird (1988) 10.30 Got To Dance (R,T,W) 11.30 Bite Size Brainiac (R,W) 11.45 Futurama (R,T,W) 1.30 Oops TV (R,W) 2.30 Noels Christmas Presents 2009 (R,T,W) 4.00 Got To Dance (R,T,W) 5.00 Futurama (R,T) 5.30 Futurama (R,T) 6.00 Are You Smarter Than Your Ten Year Old? (W) 7.00 The Simpsons (R,T) 7.30 The Simpsons (R,T) 8.00 Guinness World Records Smashed! (T,W) 9.00 War Torn Warriors (W) 10.00 Ten Minute Tales (W) 10.10 Lie To Me (R,T,W) 11.10 Modern Family (R,T,W) 11.40 UK Border Force (R) 12.40 UK Border Force (R) 10.00 Darts (W) 3.00 Netbusters (W) 3.30 Soccer AM: The Best Bits (W) 4.30 SPL Round-Up (W) 5.00 Netbusters (W) 5.30 Football Asia (T) 6.00 Revista De La Liga (W) 7.00 Live Darts (W) 12.00 Revista De La Liga (W) 9.55 Charmed 10.50 US What Not To Wear 11.45 US What Not To Wear 12.40 The New Adventures Of Old Christine 1.05 Rachael Ray. Cynthia Nixon reveals the secrets of the Sex and the City sequel. 2.00 Frasier. Bulldog has a brush with fame. 2.30 Friends 3.00 FILM: Finding John Christmas (2003) Premiere. A nurse becomes convinced a mystery man, hailed in the newspapers as a hero, is her long-lost brother. 4.50 Xpos Xtra. 5.05 Andromeda. 6.00 3e News 6.30 Xpos Daily entertainment news, with Karen Koster. 7.00 The New Adventures Of Old Christine The divorcee visits a cosmetic surgeon. 7.30 Seinfeld A dentist writes an insurance note for Jerry. 7.58 3e News Update 8.00 CSI: Miami A daredevil driver is decapitated while performing a stunt, and the team suspects there could be a sinister explanation for the incident. 8.58 3e News Update 9.00 Living With Murder Alan Hannan describes his familys quest to find the murderer of his son Jeffrey, who was killed while at a bonfire close to his home in OMalley Park, Limerick. 10.00 FILM: Narrow Margin (1990) A Los Angeles assistant DA arrives in Canada to escort the key witness in a gangland murder case back to the States. Thriller remake, starring Gene Hackman, Anne Archer, JT Walsh and James B Sikking. 12.00 Heroes. 6.00 Breakfast (T,W) 9.15 Animal 24:7 (R,T,W) 10.00 Homes Under The Hammer (R,T,W) Followed by News 11.00 Car Booty (R,T,W) 11.30 Cash In The Attic (R,T,W) Followed by News 12.15 Bargain Hunt (T,W) 1.00 BBC News; Weather (T,W) 1.30 BBC Newsline; Weather (T,W) 1.45 Only Fools And Horses (R,T) 3.00 Keeping Up Appearances (R,T) 3.30 Murder, She Wrote (R,T) 4.15 Escape To The Country (T,W) 5.00 Weakest Link (R,T,W) 6.00 BBC News (T,W) followed by Weather 6.30 BBC Newsline (T,W) followed by Weather 7.00 The One Show (T,W) Live topical reports. 7.30 EastEnders (T,W) Ronnie has a run-in with Archie, with disastrous results. Followed by BBC News; Regional News 8.00 Holby City (T,W) Preparations for his first Christmas with Holly prompt Linden to finally face up to his guilt over his wifes death. Followed by BBC Newsline Update 9.00 Paradox (T,W) When Christian goes missing after seeing a young father plummet to his death, Rebecca races to find him to decipher another set of images before it is too late. Last in the series. 10.00 BBC News (T,W) 10.25 BBC Newsline (T,W) 10.35 Wee Wise Words (T,W) 10.40 Panic Attack Christmas Special (T,W) Festive edition of the game show. 11.10 FILM: Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls (1995) (T,W) The pet detective is coaxed out of exile. 9.45 FILM: Blackbeards Ghost (1967) (T) Fantasy, starring Peter Ustinov. 11.25 Who Do You Think You Are? (R,T,W) 12.25 Victorian Farm (R,T,W) The preparations begin for winter. 1.25 FILM: Merry Christmas (2005) (T,W) 3.15 Ready Steady Cook (T,W) With Claire Sweeney and Magic Mandy. 4.00 Coast (R,T,W) The team explores the Normandy shoreline. 5.00 James Mays Toy Stories (R,T,W) The presenter enters a Plasticine garden into the Chelsea Flower Show. 6.00 Terry And June (R,T) Christmas arrives and the pressure is on Terry to buy June the right present. 6.30 FILM: Dads Army (1971) (T,W) The Home Guard soldiers are tested when they are asked to capture three German aviators. Comedy, starring Arthur Lowe and John Le Mesurier. Followed by Weather Update 8.00 The Funny Side Of Christmas (T,W) Clive Anderson presents a wry look at the TV worlds yuletide traditions, including the making of the annual Blue Peter advent crown. 9.00 Mock The Week (T,W) Topical comedy show, with Dara O Briain. 9.30 Season Ticket (T,W) Former jockey Richard Dunwoodys trek to the South Pole. Followed by Weather Update 10.00 Have I Got A Bit More News For You (T,W) 10.45 The Culture Show (T,W) A re-evaluation of Michael Jacksons impact on music. 11.45 Michael Jackson Live In Bucharest: The Dangerous Tour (T,W) The concert from October 1992, featuring the King of Pops greatest hits. 6.00 GMTV (T,W) 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,T,W) Guests air their differences. 10.30 This Morning (T,W) 12.30 Loose Women (T,W) 1.30 ITV News And Weather (T,W) 1.55 UTV News And Weather (T,W) 2.00 Dickinsons Real Deal (R,T,W) 3.00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show (T,W) Highlights of the current series. 4.00 Midsomer Murders (R,T,W) Barnaby tries to deduce whether a boys death is linked to his membership of an elite club. 6.00 UTV Live (T,W) followed by Weather 6.30 ITV News And Weather (T,W) 7.00 Emmerdale (T,W) Ryan tries to hide his guilt around Katie. 7.30 Grimefighters (T,W) Restaurant inspectors pay a return visit to a kebab shop. 7.59 UTV News Update (T,W) 8.00 Coastline Cops (T,W) An elite police marine unit in the Solent checks the Queen Mary 2s hull for terrorist bombs. Last in the series. 8.59 UTV News Update (T,W) 9.00 The Bill (T,W) Part one of two. Mickey goes undercover as a homeless man after a body is found in the river wearing a tramps coat over designer clothes. Meanwhile, Millie says goodbye to Sun Hill. 10.00 ITV News At Ten And Weather (T,W) 10.30 UTV News (T,W) 10.35 Christmas Tales: The Story Of The Tree (T) The history of the Christmas tree. 11.35 Brain Box Interactive game show in which viewers phone in with answers to on-screen questions for a chance to win a cash prize. TG4 Sky 1 Sky Sports 1 Corrigans Live Christmas Cook-Along RT1, 8.30pm Richard Corrigan will attempt to cook the perfect Christmas dinner in real time and in front of the cameras. The show which will be broadcast live will feature the perfect Christmas dinner being prepared with all the trimmings, and promises to be packed full of tips and guests including special guest co- presenter Mary Kennedy. Dinner is served: Can Corrigan cook live for us? The Funny Side Of Christmas BBC2, 8pm Clive Anderson presents us with the best and worst of Yuletide TV offerings over the years in his own inimitable style. From Christmas Top Of The Pops and TV chefs liberally dousing themselves with sherry as they cook a turkey to EastEnders annual tragedy, the festive season throws up as many moments of misery as it does moments of magic. Thank the stars we dont have the Queens speech to sit through. Festive funnies: Clive Anderson looks at Christmas TV past Film Of The Day Bad Santa TV3, 9pm This is not one for the whole family to sit down and enjoy as it probably contains more usage of the f word than Scarface and Blue Velvet combined, but it is a refreshing take on the Christmas film. Billy Bob Thornton plays a conman out to rob a department store blind after posing as the resident Santa, but as its Christmas he soon sees the error of his ways (sort of) with the aid of a needy child. You will either find it hilariously funny or horribly offensive. Claus and effect: Billy Bob Thornton gets into the Christmas cheer Chatty: Alan Carr invites some guests for Christmas, Channel 4, 10.20pm Tuesday, December 22, 2009 metrolife 17 Q11: In Brno, which singer does the Austrian fashionista invite to sit on a kneeling Mexican immigrant? TO P18 index.html2.html3.html4.html5.html6.html7.html8.html9.html10.html11.html12.html13.html14.html15.html16.html17.html18.html19.html20.html21.html22.html23.html